Recently I received a parrot as a gift. The parrot has had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth is rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. I've tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else I can think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary. Finally, fed up, I yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. I shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. So, in desperation, I threw up my hands, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.
Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.
Fearing that I'd hurt the parrot, I quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out into my outstretched arms and said, "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."Serves 4 2 lb lean boneless pork, cut into 1 inch cubes 1/2 oz. lard 1/4 pt (UK measure) dry white wine 1 1/2 tsp ground cumin 1/2 tsp finely chopped garlic 1 tsp salt Freshly ground black pepper 5 thin lemon slices, qauartered 2 Tbs finely chopped fresh coriander Pat the pork cubes thoroughly dry with kitchen paper. Melt the lard in a large, heavy frying pan over a high heat until it splutters. Add the pork cubes and brown them, turning the cubes freqauently with a wooden spoon and regulating the heat so that they brown quickly and evenly without burning. Stir in 6 tbs. of wine, the cumin, garlic, salt and a liberal grinding of pepper. Bring to the boil, then cover the pan, reduce the heat to low and simmer for about 25 mins until the pork is tender and show no resistance when piereced with the tip of a small, sharp knife. Add the remaining 3 tbs of wine and the lemon slices and cook over a high heat, turning the meat and lemon pieces constantly, until the sauce thickens very slightly. Stir in the coriander and taste for seasoning. Pour the mixture into the centre of a large heated dish and surround it if you like, with Portuguese fried potatoes. Have a great day.